All About Your Mother
Moms! And the movies that hate them.
Good evening, Melt-izens, sorry for the delay. To atone for our lateness, and because Emily is sleepy, this is another piece about women written by a man. With that out of the way, let’s cut to the quick: moms. Moms. What are they, really? Everyone’s got one, two, or maybe even three moms. Moms are not dads, that’s very clear. They can be good or bad, or maybe even neutral. But what makes a mom good or bad? Good moms are fairly boring and well-established in cinema (The Virgin Mary, Lt. Ellen Ripley, Hillary Clinton), but what about bad moms?
Bad moms—and parents by extension—are self-involved, reckless, irresponsible, and care more about themselves than the well-being of their child. However, bad moms are more fun than the good moms because they are bad—bad is always more fun. And in keeping with that profound truth, we at Space Melt Cinema will be co-presenting with Philly Film Society this Friday, May 9th the classic bad mom thesis-statement Mommie Dearest! Tickets can be found here!
To get you into the Mommie Mindset, we will list some movies we think convey bad motherhood—or we’ll guilt-trip you until you like them.
Beau is Afraid (2023)
It’s honestly kind of insane just how Ari Aster put his mommy issues on blast here—he really goes deep into the root of his neurosis, and like any good Freudian, it all begins with Patti Lupone. Hilarious movie, by the way, should have won all the Oscars just for the first 1/2, and immediately nothing after the forest-theater.
Tar (2022)
Remember when she threatened to beat the shit out of that kid in the playground? All-time TERRIBLE mothering from Lydia Tar, so bad that she gets exiled to Thailand. Okay there’s other reasons why, but I choose to remember it differently.
Stopmotion (2024)
There’s a really sick stop-motion puppet made out of literal meat in this. But yeah, it’s also about a bad mom who dominates her daughter’s life from beyond the grave, hence the meat-puppet. No one with a good mom would make one of those.
Last Summer (2024)
French as all fuck, Last Summer is really about a bad stepmom who abuses her power to sleep with her hot 17-year-old stepson; it will make you feel bad for ever using that search-term.
The Baby (1973)
Man, this movie is twisted. More about bad adoptive mothers who keep a 21 year-old man kept in a crib and deliberately stunted psychologically as a baby, makes me feel icky to even type out the plot summary. Rest assured, we will show this at a future Space Melt.
Titane (2022)
What if a mom was also a car? That’s also a bad mom. How will she attend PTA meetings? Truly insane movie—a woman has sex with a car, becomes pregnant with a car-baby, goes on a killing spree, goes into hiding as a boy at a firehouse, and helps a middle-aged firefighter find his soul. There’s also an incredible dance scene where a bunch of firefighters dance with each other, blasting cigs.
Mommy (2014)
Mostly a bad mom because she’s Quebecois.
I will say this though, none of these compare to Mommie Dearest. Reasons why? Well honey, you’re going to have to come check it out!!! You will definitely agree with our ranking, that’s a Melt-guarantee. Love and kiss, boys.